What to Do When You’re Caring for Someone: How to Cope and Where to Find Support

An elderly couple shares a joyful moment on a sunny day, standing outside a charming, vine-covered brick house.

Caring for someone you love—whether a parent, partner, child, sibling, or friend—can be both rewarding and incredibly demanding. For many people, stepping into the role of a carer happens gradually, often without much preparation. Over time, you might notice that the focus has shifted entirely onto the person you’re supporting, while your own needs have faded into the background.

If you’re caring for someone, you’re not alone. According to Carers UK, there are an estimated 5.7 million unpaid carers in the UK, and many of them are juggling work, families, and other responsibilities on top of their caring role. While it’s an act of love and dedication, caring can also take a toll on your own emotional and physical wellbeing. The good news is that support is available—and you can reach for it when the time feels right for you.

The Mental Health Impact of Caring

Caring for someone can bring with it a sense of closeness and meaning, but it can also lead to burnout, stress, anxiety, and depression. A 2022 report from Carers UK found that:

• 72% of carers have experienced mental ill health due to their role

• 61% have experienced physical health problems

• Nearly half feel they have no choice in taking on their caring role

• Many report feeling invisible, isolated, and exhausted

You may find yourself constantly ‘on alert’, struggling to switch off even when things are calm. You might feel guilt about wanting a break, or resentment that others aren’t helping more. These feelings are completely normal—and they don’t mean you’re not a good carer. They mean you’re human.

What Helps: Tips to Cope When You’re Caring for Someone

Here are some small, meaningful ways to protect your wellbeing while continuing to support the person you care for.

Allow your emotions

Many carers try to stay positive, grateful, or ‘strong’—but that can come at the cost of emotional honesty. It’s okay to feel frustrated, tired, or even angry at times. Giving space to your emotions (without judgement) helps prevent them from building up and becoming overwhelming.

Give yourself permission to rest

Taking time for yourself doesn’t make you selfish—it helps you keep going. Even short breaks can give your body and mind a chance to reset. Rest doesn’t always mean sleep—it can also mean listening to music, reading, taking a walk, or simply sitting in silence for ten minutes.

Ask for help—and accept it

Many carers feel they should cope alone, especially if no one else knows the person as well as you do. But support doesn’t have to be perfect to be helpful. If someone offers to bring you a meal, sit with your loved one for an hour, or even just listen, try to say yes.

Connect with others who understand

Carer support groups—online or in-person—can be a lifeline. Talking to people in similar situations helps reduce feelings of isolation and allows you to share ideas, tips, and mutual encouragement. Sometimes, just knowing you're not alone can make a huge difference.

Look after your own health

As a carer, it’s easy to neglect your own health appointments, meals, or exercise. But these basics are your foundation. Try to prioritise regular check-ups, even if you have to ask for help to make them happen.

Speak to a counsellor or therapist

Therapy can be a vital outlet for carers. It’s a space that’s just for you—somewhere to reflect, feel heard, and process what this role is bringing up for you emotionally. You might be holding sadness, guilt, or fear about the future, and talking through these feelings can help you find steadier ground.

How I Work with Carers in Therapy

In my counselling work, I often support carers who are feeling stretched thin, emotionally depleted, or unsure who they are outside of their caring role. Together, we create a gentle space where you can:

• Explore your feelings without fear of judgement

• Reconnect with parts of yourself that may have been lost or forgotten

• Identify practical ways to create breathing space

• Develop internal resources for self-compassion, calm, and emotional resilience

There’s no one-size-fits-all solution—each caring relationship is unique. My approach is person-centred, which means I work with you to find what supports your wellbeing best. This could be anything from boundary-setting to processing grief, or simply making room for yourself again.

Sometimes just being able to say “this is hard” and have someone truly hear you is enough to begin a shift.

Where to Find Support in the UK

You don’t have to manage everything on your own. Here are some UK-based organisations that can offer practical, emotional, and financial support:

Carers UK

Carers UK is a national charity providing expert advice, peer support, factsheets, helplines, and campaign updates for carers. They also offer an online community forum and a helpline.

Mind – Carers Support

Mind offers mental health support for carers, including practical tips for managing your own wellbeing while supporting someone else.

Local Carer Services

Many local authorities have carer assessments, respite support, and local carer hubs. You can contact your local council or GP to find out what’s available in your area.

The NHS

You may be entitled to a carer’s assessment through the NHS or local council. This looks at how caring affects your life and what support you might need.

You Deserve Care Too

You might not have chosen this role, or maybe you did—but either way, you’re carrying a lot. Caring is not just a practical task; it’s an emotional journey. Your wellbeing matters. You are allowed to need support. You are allowed to feel tired. And you are allowed to seek joy, rest, and connection outside of your role.

Whether it’s through support groups, talking to your GP, or working with a counsellor like myself, please know this: you are not alone, and you don’t have to keep everything going by yourself.

If you’d like to explore how therapy might help you find space, strength, or support in your caring role, feel free to get in touch.